tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-76124179060882488892012-03-20T02:51:03.249-07:00Tippi's cancer blogPriscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-13761287157905364792010-10-10T03:53:00.000-07:002010-10-10T04:25:36.134-07:00This will be the final entry in Tippi's Cancer Blog. 7AM, Sunday October 10th<br /><br />Tippi's life ended at about 4AM. She went peacefully with no indication of pain or anxiety.<br /><br />About a week ago she was able to celebrate her 76th birthday. Friends dropped in throughout the afternoon and she shared in the good wishes and goodbyes. Steep decline started on Wednesday and ended a few hours ago. The Hospice night nurse made the necessary phone calls. Tippi had requested cremation. So now I'm waiting for the funeral home.<br /><br />Our daughter-in-law Gail has been here during the final days. Friends, family and hospice have been very supportive. They have made a great difference to both of us.<br /><br />Larry<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-1376128715790536479?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-65600370535032540262010-08-30T10:30:00.000-07:002010-08-30T10:32:38.857-07:00Read text below<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/THvq6eJpO9I/AAAAAAAAACo/AdgIbQs6M9E/s1600/Skype.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/THvq6eJpO9I/AAAAAAAAACo/AdgIbQs6M9E/s320/Skype.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511256859264760786" /></a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-6560037053503254026?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-28999143661440843152010-08-30T10:14:00.000-07:002010-08-30T10:28:57.339-07:00Better than "Beam me up Scottie"<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">The purpose of my blog has always been to show that no matter how difficult the problem presents itself, we can usually find some resource to bring us close to a solution..<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">There was a school reunion for my class at the end of this month and I strongly wanted to attend, <span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>mainly because two of my close friends from high school planned also to go and we all thought it would be the last time we'd see each other.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">But the week before we were to make the trip -- which was six hours across the state, overnight at our sons house in eastern Pennsylvania and then another four hours north to Connecticut; it was clear that I couldn't do it.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">We called my friend Ruth in Boston -- she is pretty computer savvy -- and got her to load in the Skype into her laptop and tested out between Boston and Pittsburgh. What a thrill to see her face and hear her voice and I think she was pretty impressed too. She and Angela, my other friend, would be staying at the same hotel and we arranged to have a Skype conference on Saturday morning..<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Come that morning the phone rang and I switched over to my computer and answered it on Skype. I turned on my video button in order to see my face at the same time as they and hear the oohs and ahs and exclamations from my friends when they first saw my face. I told them to turn on their video through Ruth’s computer and then it was my turn to ooh and aaw and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>exclaim, seeing their faces talking to me from Connecticut.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">What a perfect solution. We talked, the three of us, for over an hour, I had had a wonderful last visit with my friends and afterwards, they, at my urging, went over to the cemetery and had a first view of my stone.<o:p></o:p></p> <span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language:EN-US">And there I was, at home, and bed bound and talking to my friends like a character from “A Christmas Carol”.</span><!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-2899914366144084315?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-16961763477770357852010-08-11T10:28:00.000-07:002010-08-11T10:38:33.978-07:00New LowsThis is the hardest blog to write. I am pretty much bedridden and can not receive visitors. Larry is taken good care of me and is making sure I eat and take the proper pills at the proper time<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-1696176347777035785?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-57256601945543307412010-07-06T05:36:00.000-07:002010-07-06T05:38:22.149-07:00the next step<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">I was surprised at how quickly my condition went bad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A week ago I woke with a pain in my right leg, which is one of the sites of cancer.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I knew the pain would eventually come, and that it would be severe.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The first day I got around , like an orangutan by moving from one piece of furniture to the next.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And it convinced me that now was the time to call hospice.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The intake nurse came on July 1.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Nice and clean, I am starting the second half of this year in hospice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>She checked all my present medications and indicated which ones hospice would cover.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I would have to change to a different oxygen system. They ordered a walker with wheels, and a potty chair for me.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">On the 2<sup>nd</sup> the equipment and the oxygen was delivered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A seamless change-over!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The wheeled walker is wonderful, smooth moving and quiet and really sturdy.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>We stored the potty chair in the basement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>In the evening a driver delivered a bag of medications.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>After I signed for it, I looked at the packing slip.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I did not recognize a single medication, and I did not recognize the ordering doctor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Clearly they had sent the wrong order, and some one who needed these medications was not getting them!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">A phone call to hospice the next morning cleared it up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This was my emergency package, with extreme medications for emergency, to save a trip in the ambulance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Today, a visit from <u>my</u> visiting nurse, the same who had been here before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Just to get our schedules in sync.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Now that I have “someone to watch over me” I am feeling more relaxed about this pain.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">But it will have an impact on my gadding about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Anyone who takes me to lunch will have to take me and my walker and my new oxygen bottle.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I am still happy and comfortable to have friends come visit, and admire my flowers and my porch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Before the pain hit me, my niece and her husband came to visit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>We had a wonderful 2 days, they kept the visits short and it was so good to see her after so many years.<o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-5725660194554330741?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-57714497469147399812010-05-27T07:00:00.000-07:002010-05-27T07:02:14.646-07:00the next step<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">All on the same day, I received emails from 3 distant friends. “Why haven’t you updated your cancer blog?<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>You leave us hanging<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>in a not very good space!”<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">When you are on a plateau, with each day similar to the last, and no improvements, it is easy to forget obligations like a blog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I owe you all better.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The purpose of the cancer blog was to report my experience from the inside, But as time went on and I found the cancer easy to live with – even when I was deep in chemo and radiation, it became a cause: to defuse the fright people face when diagnosed with this dreaded disease. <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Now we face a different challenge:<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>my easy cancer has turned out to be tenacious and has resisted treatment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It is still with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I am not willing to move on to harsher chemos, and so I have opted to sign up for hospice.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Not the end of life hospice, but an intermediate step, palliative<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I can always opt out of this stage of hospice and return to serious chemo. It is reassuring to think I can, but I don’t think I will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>My body longs for a rest.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I will have a visiting nurse and social worker, who will offer us their support.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>We are not making this journey alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile, we are looking into two problems that might be corrected; I have not spoken like a normal person since March, it’s a raspy, squeaky voice, very pianissimo.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>There may be some damage to the larynx.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>And to my esophagus, which feels like it has closed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Only the most finely cut foods will slip down it without pain. The result is that I am eating less and less and have lost<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>a lot of weight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I think of myself as a reporter, embedded with the team, as I make this final journey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>140<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-5771449746914739981?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-7687729196991003832010-03-01T04:28:00.000-08:002010-03-01T04:31:09.575-08:00a rough spot<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/S4uzHWsrY_I/AAAAAAAAACY/BBIqAsXCkb0/s1600-h/presentation.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/S4uzHWsrY_I/AAAAAAAAACY/BBIqAsXCkb0/s320/presentation.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5443641513540805618" /></a> <!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">I have been reminded by some of my friends that my blog needs to be updated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>How true!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The thing of it is that I have dedicated this blog to point out the positive – that I have lived with cancer for over a year and a half, and for the most part very well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>There have been rough patches, which eventually get resolved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I don’t like to write when I’m down.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I am in a rough patch right now.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>My oncologist knew, and I knew, that the last scan would be bad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And so it was.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The cancer was still there, and had not been reduced. That is so discouraging.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So now I am on a heavier soup of chemo, which brings with it the heavier side effects.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Losing hair, nails effected, and the coughing is back, which affects my sleep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I am very tired.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And then this February’s snowfall is enough to make anyone depressed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">There are positive notes.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Not is all gloom and doom.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>My husband takes such good care of me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have found a driver for those days he is not available.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>My church circle meets at my house so I have company at least twice a month, and one or two stalwart friends make it over from time to time.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And my precious grand daughter, who is a freshman at Pitt,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>comes for the weekend every two or three weeks – even in all the snow!<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Last weekend she was here to keep me company, cook us a wonderful eggplant parmesian dinner, and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>do her laundry.<o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-768772919699100383?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-59802442081873543662010-01-26T07:06:00.000-08:002010-01-26T07:08:28.622-08:00the next stepJan. 25, 2010<div><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">. Today my life was dominated by a full body PET scan at Jefferson.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have reason to believe the results will not be good and will result in some heavy duty chemo, and this is upsetting.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">Larry left me off at the hospital at 8 am and, after registering, I went to the multi test room for a double blood draw – for the Nuclear Medicine people and for Jalil.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">And then the long walk down to Nuclear Medicine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Luckily I had my oxygen pack with me.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">At the nuclear medicine center I sat and waited for nearly 45 minutes for the infusion center to send down someone to access my port. She was a chipper young blond who wanted to know what was good, but in my mood, nuttin was good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>She did complement my hairdo. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">Once my port was accessed, they poured in the radioactive dye and had me nap for an hour.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And I really fell asleep.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">Then I was wheeled (by wheelchair) to the outboard trailer that holds the CT/PT machine, followed my a cluster of executive types, evaluating the system.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">Up into the trailer, down on the flatbed, and at a very slow pace, rolled through the machine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was very good and still and did not cough<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>once.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">Back at the nuclear medicine center, the infusion girl was waiting to de-access my port, and then I was free to go!<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">It was nearly 1 pm and I was famished.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">We stopped at chilpotle grill on the way home, and got a basket to share.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A good lunch for the both of us, rice and vegetables and beef with sour cream and guacamole over all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Bookman Old Style"">And then I slept.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I just couldn’t get enough sleep!<o:p></o:p></span></p> <!--EndFragment--> </div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-5980244208187354366?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-91696596368331728692009-12-09T07:26:00.000-08:002009-12-09T07:28:29.777-08:00on Love<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Our discussion group had an interesting topic this month – on<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>love, lust, sex and how science has changed them.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Let me speak on love, and the curative power of love. A power that science, with all its instruments and theories, cannot quantify.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I sincerely believe that the power of love has made it possible for me to be here,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>a year and a half after I was given only months to live.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Let me try to explain. <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Too often, we take our friends for granted, and then in an instant they are taken from us – – and we cry out, “But I didn’t have a chance to tell him how much he meant to me, how much I loved him!” or “what an impact she had on my life.”<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Cancer is a generous disease, it gives us the time to show how much we care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>When we leave, we leave behind no regrets, no missed opportunities to reach out to family and friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I have been surrounded by love this last year, from so many Sunnyhillers, by my family and friends, by my neighbors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>They have shown their love through hugs and attention and by 100 kindnesses. This love has come not only from those I always counted as friends, but also from so many others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>They have provided me with rides when I could not drive, meals when I could not cook.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I have been given me an encouraging word and a pat on the back when I needed them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And my husband has been so wonderful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>He has become a soul mate and help mate and is there for me. He is both a pusher and a puller.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>He pushes me when he thinks I am up to a task, and pulls me along when I’m not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>He nags that I should get out more, eat more, do my breathing exercises.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>On mornings when I can’t bend over to tie my shoes, he is there. And many an evening I am not up to cooking, he takes over in the kitchen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>He drives me when I am not up to it, and lets me go when I can.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>He encourages me to be as strong as I am able.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And all this is love, better shown than said.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-9169659636833172869?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-77121613568757516742009-12-06T04:48:00.000-08:002009-12-06T13:53:58.626-08:00thanksgiving videoGoing home for the holidays means traveling across the state to our son's home in eastern Pa. He makes the best roast turkey on his Weber Grill. We made this little video 2 years ago and put it up on YouTube. It has received over 9,000 hits during those 2 years and gained another 1,500 over this Thanksgiving holiday!<div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><object width="320" height="266" class="BLOG_video_class" id="BLOG_video-a5181db40e9a0912" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/get_player"><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"><param name="flashvars" value="flvurl=http://v9.nonxt2.googlevideo.com/videoplayback?id%3Da5181db40e9a0912%26itag%3D5%26app%3Dblogger%26ip%3D0.0.0.0%26ipbits%3D0%26expire%3D1337850791%26sparams%3Did,itag,ip,ipbits,expire%26signature%3D1DC4081B5BC5980D557740957AC4E699783FFC32.4F0531470EB53E5351D05C239C2627B9BD7A44B8%26key%3Dck1&iurl=http://video.google.com/ThumbnailServer2?app%3Dblogger%26contentid%3Da5181db40e9a0912%26offsetms%3D5000%26itag%3Dw160%26sigh%3DqTIMfaV9KkCO0IXYjx7WR9XTLBk&autoplay=0&ps=blogger"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/get_player" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="320" height="266" bgcolor="#FFFFFF" flashvars="flvurl=http://v9.nonxt2.googlevideo.com/videoplayback?id%3Da5181db40e9a0912%26itag%3D5%26app%3Dblogger%26ip%3D0.0.0.0%26ipbits%3D0%26expire%3D1337850791%26sparams%3Did,itag,ip,ipbits,expire%26signature%3D1DC4081B5BC5980D557740957AC4E699783FFC32.4F0531470EB53E5351D05C239C2627B9BD7A44B8%26key%3Dck1&iurl=http://video.google.com/ThumbnailServer2?app%3Dblogger%26contentid%3Da5181db40e9a0912%26offsetms%3D5000%26itag%3Dw160%26sigh%3DqTIMfaV9KkCO0IXYjx7WR9XTLBk&autoplay=0&ps=blogger" allowFullScreen="true" /></object><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-7712161356875751674?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-79492482414355823522009-11-14T11:34:00.000-08:002009-11-14T11:36:58.855-08:00feeling well, looking upI had a six month's check up with my primary care physician and reported to Larry when I got home that he, the doctor, thinks that my recovery has been nothing short of remarkable.<div><br /></div><div>Later, that evening, I heard Larry singing in the shower -- something he hasn't done for over a year!</div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-7949248241435582352?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-36490508274841009132009-10-29T04:48:00.001-07:002009-10-29T04:52:58.712-07:00the plot thickens<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">We drove to Connecticut for the weekend; I needed to clear up some problems with my cemetery plot there.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I am in the surprising position of having two plots in that cemetery and telephone communication has been a frustrating exercise.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">We were raised in Westport; my parents are buried in the town cemetery, and Larry grew up on the street adjoining it and used it as a playground.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It seemed the appropriate place for us to have our own COMDEN plot.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">PLAN A – in 1986, with an unexpected bonus weighing down my pocket, I decided to buy a Willowbrook plot.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I was spending a lot of time with my mother-in-law in CT that summer, and one day we went over to select a plot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>One had just opened up that was perfect!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>In the older section, within sight of their old house, and a short walk from my parent’s grave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And the price happened to be just a little more than my bonus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I bought it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I filed the papers away, sure that I was set when the time came to need it.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">When my cancer was diagnosed, I brought out that file and began to outline plans to have my ashes buried there.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Alas! A big monkey wrench was thrown into my plans – by Larry Comden who pointed out that it was an awfully expensive practical joke (I planned to have our epitaph read: <i>And we couldn’t afford to live here</i><span style="font-style:normal">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>True.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Then he said, ‘your plot is for full burial and we plan to be cremated.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>True.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Then he said, “I don’t want to be buried in Westport”.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>In 22 years, I had never asked.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And, although he was the objector, it was up to me to sell the plot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I learned that the cemetery would not buy back the plot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I didn’t trust the on-line broker who promised to sell it – for a hefty fee.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>What to do?<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">PLAN B -<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>By summer I had come up with Plan B:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I would donate it to the local UU Church who would know how to advertise its availability and could keep the $3000.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Donation to a worthy organization, problem solved!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Not quite.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was presented with a phone tree and picked the business manager as the appropriate person to approach with this donation.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I left a message.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>There was no call back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Then I sent a long email to the church, explaining who I was, what the plot was and why I wanted to donate it to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Still no response.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Finally, thinking that they were perhaps on vacation, I asked Rod to contact their pastor, which he did and received an enthusiastic reply and a promise that the business manager would get in touch with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But they did not respond, not even a “thanks but no thanks”.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">PLAN C -<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>During all this time I gave a lot of thought as to why I wanted to be buried in Westport, why Pittsburgh, my home for over half my life, was not to benefit from my ashes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Willowbrook is a beautiful, well kept cemetery, and I know most of the sections in it very well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It holds the bones of my parents and their friends, and of my friends parents, and of the business men in town, and my doctor and dentist. Some of my teachers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The librarian, some of the town cops.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It is a comfortable place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I visit it each time I go to Westport.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This was where I want to go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I also want a Comden presence in the cemetery; Larry’s parents were important in the town the many years they lived there (they are buried in Long Island).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>PLAN A would have covered both points.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But why waste the space of a double plot for a single cremation?<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I called the cemetery back and offered an even-steven trade – my double plot for a single cremation plot.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The manager countered -<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I could have my urn buried on my parent’s plot, and add a footstone with my name on it, and they would<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><u>try</u> to sell my double wide, double deep, excellently located piece of ground.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">So that is where it stands.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>And I like the thought of returning to my family fold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I am trying to talk my sister into joining me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And, if it hasn’t sold by the time I die, it will be back to PLAN A which I will also have set in place.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">It was a trip worth doing,<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>and we had several visits with friends still there as a bonus. <o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/SumBPE_tWsI/AAAAAAAAACQ/0n4akMOefeA/s1600-h/standing+where.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/SumBPE_tWsI/AAAAAAAAACQ/0n4akMOefeA/s320/standing+where.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397987724419226306" /></a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-3649050827484100913?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-63029334547795361992009-10-29T03:37:00.000-07:002009-10-29T04:09:12.440-07:00<object width="320" height="266" class="BLOG_video_class" id="BLOG_video-14136be6d153f9bc" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/get_player"><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"><param name="flashvars" value="flvurl=http://v13.nonxt1.googlevideo.com/videoplayback?id%3D14136be6d153f9bc%26itag%3D5%26app%3Dblogger%26ip%3D0.0.0.0%26ipbits%3D0%26expire%3D1337850791%26sparams%3Did,itag,ip,ipbits,expire%26signature%3D2CC41422A6FCFCF8301EEECA8B13460FF79898A7.31356BE08B946676330003078A7C9D538A55F898%26key%3Dck1&iurl=http://video.google.com/ThumbnailServer2?app%3Dblogger%26contentid%3D14136be6d153f9bc%26offsetms%3D5000%26itag%3Dw160%26sigh%3DeJNKSxuAiiEorCzTdY3qiOi0844&autoplay=0&ps=blogger"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/get_player" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="320" height="266" bgcolor="#FFFFFF" flashvars="flvurl=http://v13.nonxt1.googlevideo.com/videoplayback?id%3D14136be6d153f9bc%26itag%3D5%26app%3Dblogger%26ip%3D0.0.0.0%26ipbits%3D0%26expire%3D1337850791%26sparams%3Did,itag,ip,ipbits,expire%26signature%3D2CC41422A6FCFCF8301EEECA8B13460FF79898A7.31356BE08B946676330003078A7C9D538A55F898%26key%3Dck1&iurl=http://video.google.com/ThumbnailServer2?app%3Dblogger%26contentid%3D14136be6d153f9bc%26offsetms%3D5000%26itag%3Dw160%26sigh%3DeJNKSxuAiiEorCzTdY3qiOi0844&autoplay=0&ps=blogger" allowFullScreen="true" /></object><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-6302933454779536199?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-57958102166018254302009-10-20T07:21:00.000-07:002009-10-20T07:34:13.121-07:00Celebrations!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/St3KMyZt6cI/AAAAAAAAACI/cZ6f22iSHzw/s1600-h/04+brunch.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 206px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/St3KMyZt6cI/AAAAAAAAACI/cZ6f22iSHzw/s320/04+brunch.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394690249696602562" /></a><br /><div><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">I have great reason to celebrate – the scans all came back clean and I am cancer free, at least for the moment, and I passed my 75<sup>th</sup> birthday! Is this the point a woman does not mind disclosing her age?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>For me, most certainly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I am delighted to be 75.<o:p></o:p></p> <span style="font-family:Times;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">I gathered some close friends, including my grand daughter Hope, and took them all to brunch at the Grand Concourse Restaurant – one of the grandest buildings in town, it once was a railroad station with vaulted ceilings and stained glass.</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">And the</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">brunch is sumptuous!</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">I don’t eat the way I used to, but imagine, lox galore!</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Donuts straight from the lard, just like my grandma used to make.</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">(OK, grandma used lard, they probably use something a little healthier).</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Rare roast beef, bacon, omelets to order and waffles with many toppings.</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">I could go on and on, just as we ate on and on.</span></span><!--EndFragment--> </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/St3JxGkujyI/AAAAAAAAACA/xe7ZDiEGOwk/s1600-h/clem+on+keyboard.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/St3JxGkujyI/AAAAAAAAACA/xe7ZDiEGOwk/s320/clem+on+keyboard.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394689774075154210" /></a><br /><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">And then, more reason to celebrate, I finally got a laptop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A lenovo, identical to Larry’s, so that if it develops any quirks – as mine usually do – he will be able to untangle it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I can use it sitting on my sofa, I can take it on trips, I can exchange files with my Mac.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The only thing it can’t do is video, I’ll have to wait until I get the Mac repaired to go back to editing.<o:p></o:p></p> <span style="font-family:Times;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-size:medium;">Of course, my friend Clem couldn’t resist claiming it for his own.</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Fat chance!</span></span><!--EndFragment--> </div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Times, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Times, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Times, serif;"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/St3JVjh5iiI/AAAAAAAAAB4/JfiBnoeUqzE/s1600-h/Marie+%26+Tippi.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 218px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/St3JVjh5iiI/AAAAAAAAAB4/JfiBnoeUqzE/s320/Marie+%26+Tippi.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394689300811581986" /></a><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Times, serif;"> <!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">And finally, a thumb of the nose at mortality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Every year I am able, I shamble at the Zombie walk at Monroeville Mall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Zombies, I feel, are as much victim as menace; how else do you get more vampires.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And the crowd grows every year.<o:p></o:p></p> <span style="font-family:Times;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-size:medium;">Am I the oldest zombie shambling along?</span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">I am the only one carrying her own oxygen (it was labeled “Swamp Gas” – more likely sustenance for a zombie than oxygen.</span></span><!--EndFragment--> </span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-5795810216601825430?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-11846867517884459562009-09-29T11:46:00.000-07:002009-09-29T11:47:19.688-07:00Good news!<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Good news!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Good news!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have just returned from the oncologist where I was told that last week’s scans show me, once again, to be completely free of cancer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">On my last blog, I was worrying about the return of the cough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I immediately scheduled<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>an appointment with my lung doctor, who changed one of my medications.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Simbicort<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>has diminished my coughing greatly and this last week I have been breathing better and better. I was even out on my bike one afternoon.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">At the same time, the oncologist scheduled the two scans, a PT/CAT scan of the full body and an MRI of the brain and those were the results read to me today.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">But with each rainbow comes a little rain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>On Thursday I had a dentist appointment and he uttered the two most hated and feared words in my universe:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>ROOT CANAL.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">So here we are.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Delighted to be officially cancer free again, crushed to have to face the root canal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-1184686751788445956?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-7384366236952926162009-09-17T08:35:00.000-07:002009-09-17T08:36:20.173-07:00a step backwards ----<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Everything had been going so well – I’ve been driving myself to the store, to most Dr. appointments,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>to church.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>We have made it a point to have at least one outing a week, and to include friends when we go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And I have been feeling really good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The fall weather is glorious!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">But Monday I began to cough again, and this is incessant, unproductive, bothersome.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I sleep about an hour and then wake up coughing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Unless we can quell it, I will be barred from meetings and concert halls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">My lung doctor has prescribed a stronger inhalent and we hope<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>that it will quell the cough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But it takes time to take effect.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I looked at a chart in his examination room, showing the evils of smoking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Of course, it included lung cancer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The illustration depicts the tumor thrusting itself into the bronchial tube.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>That is what my present “tickle” feels like.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And the PT scan should show if it is the lung cancer that has returned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">So here I am, in limbo, on the edge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I am otherwise feeling generally good,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>although tired from and of all that coughing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have a scan next week and will see my oncologist then, and then we’ll know better where I’m at.<o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-738436623695292616?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-86056722201991678652009-08-23T03:54:00.000-07:002009-08-23T03:55:10.709-07:00I must speak out!<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">After listening to these rude and mis-informed people shouting at our Senator Spector, I must speak out!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">As a cancer patient, with metastatic lung cancer, I am walking the walk, talking the talk.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Every time I go into the hospital, I am asked, “Do you have a living will?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>and “Is it on file at this hospital?”<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Yes and yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have had one for years, in which I clearly outline the point beyond which I will have no extraordinary measures taken.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>My oncologist understands and agrees with me.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I have also talked with a person at our local hospice, and understand what services they will be able to offer.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I am comfortable with what I hear.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>And, it is all covered by Medicare.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I am back on chemo.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have a treatment of chemo (carboplatin and Alimta) dripped in through my port.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I also get an anti-nausea drug and vitimin B-12 at that time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have 2 weeks of rest before it is time for the next treatment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I know how much some of these chemicals cost, thanks to several articles in the NY Times discussing the high cost of cancer drugs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Alimta, they tell me, is $4,000 <u>per dose</u>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Carboplatin is over $1,000 per dose.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Neulasta is over $3,000.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The drug companies accept lower payments from Medicare, and my co-pay is around $12.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">These drugs are very expensive, and they seem to work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have so few side effects.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>After my September treatment we will go into a longer rest period and order another scan.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I am feeling well, although my energy is very low.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I can’t just “get up and go” the way I used to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>There are a number of projects I need to complete (ethical will, memoirs) and these expensive chemicals are buying me the time to do it in.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-8605672220199167865?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-71129491727602217072009-08-10T05:04:00.000-07:002009-08-10T05:06:25.824-07:00Aug. 9 - Sunday morning<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Those who saw me at church last Sunday will already know what this post is all about!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I have, until now, been very dependant on my husband for getting me to and from places I need to go, and he has always complied with grace and good will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Except on summer Sunday mornings, when he prefers to attend the lawn concerts at Mellon Park.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And I do, too,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>and that is where you will usually find us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Except last Sunday, when he had a radio club activity.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And, in thinking about it, I decided that Sunday morning was a good time to put my foot to the metal and try driving again!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The breathing therapies and medications I have been receiving over the months are working.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I can go without oxygen for large portions of the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The coughing has greatly decreased.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>These were things that kept me isolated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>No more!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The only problem was that I was having a bad hair day!!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Thought I would never see one of them again.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I’m so glad I went.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I saw so many fond faces.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The program was excellent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The current events discussion lively.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> And mingling among my many friends, I felt connected, I felt alive!</span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><br /><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-7112949172760221707?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-16922017407136202492009-08-06T04:50:00.000-07:002009-08-07T03:35:15.157-07:00These friends of mine<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/SnrDx-Kav3I/AAAAAAAAABQ/Xo0I6_-7Py0/s1600-h/blog+couch1.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/SnrDx-Kav3I/AAAAAAAAABQ/Xo0I6_-7Py0/s320/blog+couch1.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5366817169233067890" /></a><br /><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, grapple them to your heart with hoops of steel –<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The question is, how can I keep the connections alive when I am unable<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>to do the reaching out?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I seldom drive any more, and then it is very limited distances.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>My husband is my chauffeur, especially at night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So the thing is, yes, this cancer has limited me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>One way or another, my friends must come to me.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I remember how I used to feel about cancer patients, even when they had been close friends of mine – I was afraid of them!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>“How can I be with a person I know is going to die?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Denial and avoidance!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>How wrongheaded I was.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I deprived both myself and my friend of some rich moments together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I have had cancer for a year now, and I do not feel about to die!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Let’s focus on the things I still can do --<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I can go out to lunch, or to a lawn concert or museum.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have a wheel chair for trips out.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I am happy to have visitors to my house (especially if they bring lunch), to sit on my wonderful porch and talk.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>When I tire, I say so.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">One of my Monroeville friends, a woman I worked with at WPSD, uses the distance between us as an excuse to use visits to me as an outing for her 90+ yr old mother.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have known her mother for many years, and feel very comfortable to have her included.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Two friends opened their house for a pot-luck party, for those who had not seen me in many months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Now they could see me with hair!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It was a wonderful party, but eventually I tired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And let’s not ignore the internet.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Several friends are expert at gathering interesting, cute pictures that they forward to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Uplifting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And I know they are thinking of me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>(my email address, by the way, is:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><a href="mailto:tcomden@mindspring.com">tcomden@mindspring.com</a><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">So this blog is an invitation to my friends to come – call before you come – we both are happy to see you.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I will start treatment next week, one week of treatment, two off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This will go on well into the fall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Off weeks are better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-1692201740713620249?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-25715912729082922952009-08-01T08:22:00.000-07:002009-08-02T12:06:30.487-07:00July 26 - Back in the hospital<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">Drats!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> DAMN! Dagnabitt!</span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">I am back in the hospital again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">I really didn’t want this to happen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">The canula of my night time oxygen system was irritating my nose, making it red, swollen and painful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I noticed this on Friday.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">I treated it with an antiseptic cream, but Saturday it was still there and had spread to the sinuses under my eyes. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">I had a party to go to on Sat. night and decided to ignore the redness and puffiness until Sunday morning.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">I went to a MedFirst place Sunday morning, saying, “I don’t know if this is serious or not” and they said, “Yes, serious” and “Promise me you’ll go directly to Jefferson.”<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Bookman Old Style"font-family:";">And Jefferson said, “Yes serious” and admitted me.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal">For the next 4 days I was trapped on the 4th floor, tethered on one side by an antibiotic drip and on the other by an oxygen tube. Watched a lot of TV and couldn't wait to go home. Released on Wed. afternoon, and everything including the cats, is back to normal.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Chemo resumes in another week.</p> <div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-2571591272908292295?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-62908533543619739512009-07-30T03:52:00.000-07:002009-08-01T17:24:48.805-07:00July 21 - Joshua's visit<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/SnTcsvleHHI/AAAAAAAAABA/IVUdq617zgA/s1600-h/1935josh+Gail.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/SnTcsvleHHI/AAAAAAAAABA/IVUdq617zgA/s320/1935josh+Gail.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5365155717351087218" /></a><br /><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><br /><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I was anxious to see my grandson Joshua again before he leaves on July 31, for a year in Brazil.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>There is always the worry that I may not be here when he gets back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Josh graduated this past May from the Univ. of<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Delaware with a degree in chemical engineering.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But he is not sure he wants to devote his life to engineering, having discovered he is more of a people person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This year will give him a chance to try his hand at teaching.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A year of total emersion in a foreign country is a good experience for any young person and Josh has gone about it<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>in a very organized way.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>He has started a blog ( dizzleinbrizzle.blogspot.com )<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>where he describes his preparations and promises to keep us in touch with updates.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Josh and I also spent some time looking at my family trees and history project.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have a deep-seated hope that at least one of my grandchildren will catch the “spark” and carry it on, and Josh may be the one.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">He brought his mother with him, to share the driving across state.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>They also had time together in the car, 6 hours each way..<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I am always happy to see my daughter-in-law Gail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>They have lived too far away for her to become the daughter I never had, but she has been a good mother to my grandchildren, and supportive wife to my son, and I love her for that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">6 years ago, Gail’s mother died of lung cancer which lodged in the brain,, and Gail spent the last 2 months with her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>She knows, better than I, what I have to expect down the road, and I know she’ll be here for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>She and I also talked about how she and the family can help Larry, when the time comes.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>These are difficult conversations, but are better confronted now than ignored.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">She also showed me a “Grandmother’s” book that she and her mother made to be left to the grandchildren.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>In it, “Grammie” recounts her first interactions with each grandchild and the special memories she has for each one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Included is the family tree of Grammie’s side of the family, and family recipes and pictures.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>These notebooks will become family treasures, and keep her memory fresh in the hearts of her grandchildren.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I plan to do something similar – I had always planned to leave a copy of my family history (which can be seen at <a href="http://www.pittsburghdiary.com/">www.pittsburghdiary.com/</a>) for each of the grandchildren, and now I will add my own memories of vacations spent with the children and let them know how special they are to me.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Ethical Wills<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">An ethical will is an opportunity for the older generation to pass on their values to their descendants through a document that would be a part of their final papers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>As Unitarians, we are all expected to create our own credo over the years, as we study and learn and grow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have worked on mine for over 30 years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It would be entirely appropriate for me to include my ethical will in my “grandmother’s book”.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The best example of an ethical will comes from Shakespeare, from Hamlet, Act I Scene III.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Polonius is bidding his son goodbye as Laertes leaves for a year in France.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>He offers some advice, including:<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-tab-count:1"> </span>“Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-tab-count:1"> </span>Grapple them to your heart with hoops of steel”<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">What wonderful words!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>“Their adoption tried” and “Grapple them to your heart with hoops of steel” Don’t ever be too busy for these friends!<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Show them you love them!<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And his final words to Laertes have been a beacon to me all my life:<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">“This above all, to thine own self be true<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">and it must follow as the night the day,<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">thou canst not then be false to any man.”<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-6290853354361973951?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-34837723721508692672009-07-22T13:20:00.000-07:002009-07-23T04:19:01.057-07:00July 20, 2009 -- a respite from treatment<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">I woke up this morning feeling really good, strong, happy. A brand new day ahead of me, thinking about the many things I need to do for my grandson’s visit.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I realized it has been a year this week since I was first diagnosed with lung cancer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>At that time I thought that a diagnosis of cancer meant a sentence of death, and a horrible, painful death at that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I did not think that July 2009 would find me alive and feeling well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I wish someone had told me, “you can live with cancer, and live a full and satisfying life as well.”<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">I try to keep connected to life, and do at least one thing a day that I would have done before the cancer – get out of the house, to the store, visit a friend, go somewhere interesting.<span> </span>I can still cook and shop.<span> </span>I can go to informal concerts and discussion groups (salons) with my friends.<span> Sorry to say, the energy only lasts until after lunch, when I retreat to the couch and a nice long nap.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><p class="MsoNormal">My lagging strength and energy has forced me to give up the active parts of my life – swimming, biking.<span> </span>And while that was important at one time, I can set it all aside and still be satisfied with my life.<span> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">I have my friends and my family, and they are the most important part of my life. And cancer has given me the time to let them know that, and put all my things in order.</p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> =========================================================<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">A recap of this last year, living with cancer:<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I was diagnosed at the end of <b>July,</b><span style="font-weight:normal"> 2008.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b>August</b><span style="font-weight:normal"> was taken up with scans and tests,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>a PT scan of chest, CT scan of abdomen, and an MRI.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A bone scan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>A biopsy of the tumor, guided by CT scan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Media stenoscopy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Implantation of port for chemotherapy.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Started my first round of chemo on Sept. 8.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This consisted of 5 doses (etopodide and cisplaten), rest for 3 weeks, then 5 more doses.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Meanwhile radiation of the tumor began, 1 session per weekday for 36 days.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">During both the chemo and the radiation I did not feel any pain nor nausea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>At all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It was an easy cancer.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The radition left me very tired, and I scaled my activities back to half a day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I could go shopping, have lunch with my friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>When my hair fell out, my friends threw me a babushka party.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I bought several wigs but found I seldom wore them.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">A scan in Feb. implied that the cancer had been destroyed and I was declared in remission.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But my oncologist was worried about my cough and sent me to a lung doctor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>After several tests, he declared I had a serious case of emphysema.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">From cured to invalid in the space of one week! I was outfitted with a breathing regime (albuterol) and several puffers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>My days became tied to the breathing schedule.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was depressed. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">And so it has gone through the spring - cancer on hold, emphysema to the forefront. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-3483772372150869267?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-24196571562907893442009-07-16T10:34:00.000-07:002009-07-18T05:46:22.486-07:00July 15, 2009<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/Sl9qej7k3TI/AAAAAAAAAAM/_Hdyortp8d8/s1600-h/89+frame+front.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 256px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vYH4zFxEiUk/Sl9qej7k3TI/AAAAAAAAAAM/_Hdyortp8d8/s320/89+frame+front.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5359119154867920178" /></a><br /><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">A Day to be Endured!</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The day of my stereotactic radiosurgery (gamma knife) at Allegheny General Hospital, to remove a small tumor<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>from deep inside my brain.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">We arrived at AGH at 5:30 am and wandered empty hallways, looking for the elevator that would take us to the 11<sup>th</sup> floor – to the ambulatory care center.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> We finally encountered a human being who led us to the correct elevator. </span>In contrast to the empty hallways below, the waiting room there was jam packed! We waited. Coffee for Larry, shut-eye for me. Individually we were called to the registration desk, and from there sent down to a ready room to await the next step.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I changed into a hospital gown and waited on my gurney until they were ready for me on the radiation floor.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>At that point Larry left for home, to pick up some forgotten items. Costly, he used his validated parking ticket and had to pay full price upon return.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I was first given an MRI and then taken to a room where the frame was fitted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>They had warned that the worst pain of the day would be from screwing the frame into my skull.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Owwie! They were right!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But the pain subsided after the frame was in place and set.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> The frame was </span>uncomfortable, being heavy enough to impede head movement, and I could not put on my glasses behind it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Nor could I eat or drink.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">After the frame was set in place, it was back to my room to wait until the computer that controls the gamma ray machine was programmed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This took several hours. Larry was there, and had brought a book to read, and I listened to an audio book by Amy Tan – “the Bonesetters Daughter”.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Finally, at long last, they were ready for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Back down to the 4<sup>th</sup> floor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was wheeled into the room with the gamma ray machine, and my frame was bolted into the bed that is wheeled into it’s hole. There was no movement of my head whatsoever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was in place about 20 minutes as the gamma machine moved around me, shooting its rays into my skull.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was fully awake and aware the entire time.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">When we were done, I was wheeled into another small room where the frame was removed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Owwie!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>For the second time today, I was feeling pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It was short lived.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I was released from that frame and sent back upstairs to recuperate.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">A hot meatloaf dinner was waiting for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Without the frame, I could get a fork to my mouth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Larry, who had in the meanwhile gone down to the cafeteria for his meal, shared my dessert</span>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">By 5, we were released to go home.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>It had been a long day, and I was tired.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">And by the next morning, I felt fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Back to my old self again.</p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-2419657156290789344?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-19082224751680401352009-07-11T04:44:00.000-07:002009-07-11T04:49:14.377-07:00July 10, 2009<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Things are moving fast! We spent Friday morning meeting with the two specialists who will oversee my upcoming procedure. Most of the morning was spent waiting, and filling out forms (I am surprised that Allegheny General does not have a networked computer system, so that questions answered in one department are also answered for the other and do not have to be repeated)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>That said, it gives us something to do while waiting ---<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The procedure, which is scheduled for Wed. July 15, will kill the tumor by focused radiation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The neurosurgeon, Dr. Aziz, will work with the radiation oncologist, Dr. Fuhrer, to aim the precisely at the tumor and avoid damaging any living tissue.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Dr. Aziz showed us, on a model of the brain, exactly where the tumor lies – very deep in the brain, embedded in white matter in the posterior left ventricle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So deep and so small, it is not operable by ordinary methods.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The focused radiation is a common procedure, and the hospital has a lot of experience doing it.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The failure rate (that is, not a complete kill of the tumor) is about 3%.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This is very reassuring.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The side effects could be headache, caused by swelling of tissue, and (I’ve forgotten what it is called) the very rare problem of reabsorption of the dead tumor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Prior to the procedure, but on the same morning, I will be fitted with a frame that is screwed into the skull.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>This will be done under local anesthetic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Everyone assured me that it will be extremely uncomfortable, if not painful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">From there my frame and I will have a limited MRI which will help my doctors aim the radiation beam.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>That planning session will take several hours while frame and I relax! in a recovery area.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Then on to the radiation room, where the procedure will take place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The frame will be screwed into the table so that there is no chance of movement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I worry about my coughing at this point.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">When the procedure is done, my frame and I are still not finished. We will be wheeled back for a post procedure scan, to determine the success of the operation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And only then will frame and I part company.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Time in the recovery room, where they promise me a meal of hospital food (is that a reward, or what?)<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Eventually I will be discharged and Larry will take me home.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Poor Larry!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The hospital insists he hang around, with nothing to do but worry about me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>In the past, when Larry was in that hospital, I would sneak out to the Warhol or the Mattress factory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Larry is not one to ask.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I am hoping that one of his friends, on reading this, will come and keep him company.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Perhaps they can go to lunch together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-1908222475168040135?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7612417906088248889.post-7001087645688795182009-07-02T12:47:00.000-07:002009-07-03T05:07:59.247-07:00July 2, 2009I have just stepped onto the threshhold of my second bout with cancer and my family and many friends want to know the details. I thought this blog could substitute for individual emails and letters, at least it is worth a try.<div>background: My first bout came a year ago, in July 2008 I was diagnosed with lung cancer. I entered immediately into treatment, which consisted of both chemo (epitome and cisplaten)and radiation. I was very lucky; I never felt any nausea nor pain. In Feb. I was declared cancer-free, in remission. I'd have a scan every 3 months.</div><div>But the coughing, which led to the discovery of the cancer, remained. I was sent to a lung specialist who declared I had extreme emphysema. I went from cancer free to invalid in the space of one week.</div><div>My life has been taken over by the emphysema. I have a nebulizer, which I use 4 x a day, and an oxygen concentrator, with clear tubing snaking across the ceilings of the house to the bedroom, and another run to the livingroom couch. I can have oxygen where ever I go. When I leave the house I carry a portable oxygen tank with me. This has not been life as I lived it before the cancer, although the coughing is slightly diminished.</div><div>In May I had my 3 month "look-see" scan and, alas, it showed the cancer had migrated - to the hip, to the liver and to the pectoral muscle. I went immediately into treatment again - my fear was that it might migrate to the brain. The purpose of this latest round of chemo was to keep it at bay, and away from the brain. At the same time a brain scan was ordered, and it showed a small lesion (8mm) in the posterior of the left ventricle. </div><div>Now I am really frightened. I can fight the other cancers, and keep my self hood. But in the brain, the seat of my ego and personality? I don't think so. </div><div>We have temporarily suspended the chemo, and I have elected to have brain surgery, using focussed radiation, at AGH in Pittsburgh. </div><div>I talked with my friend Bob, who in real life is a psychiatrist, and knows more about the brain than anyone else I know. He says that in that location it will not damage my personality. He praises the team at AGH, even sent his daughter there several years ago to have a skin cancer removed. You can't get a better recommendation than that. I am reasonably assured that they will get the cancer, and nothing else. I will have a consultation with them next week, and will "report" what I learn on this blog. </div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7612417906088248889-700108764568879518?l=tippiscancerblog.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Priscilla Comdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12612191022924777968noreply@blogger.com1